Othello –

Here’s what you should know about Othello –

Othello is a black general who is very much in love with Desdemona. Desdemona is the daughter of the governor. Now, Iago (who is an evil, conniving fool) is really jealous of Othello and wants his job as head general. Anyway – Othello and Desdemona elope. And Iago who wants to get Othello fired from his position goes to tattle to the governor who is Desdemona’s daddy, remember? Anyway, this gets the governor all fired up – BUT the council @ the same time wants to send Othello to go defend an island and Desdemona insists on coming along. So, the governor’s pleas are put aside for the needs of the council. Anyway, through various tricks, Iago tries to trick Othello into thinking that Desdemona is cheating on him. This causes Othello to become wildly jealous and suffocates Desdemona. After killing her, he realizes what he did and stabs himself. I’m pretty sure he stabs Iago too and a bunch of other people. Anyway, as he’s dying, Desdemona comes “back to life” and she is very upset and she doesn’t kill herself though, because as we all know – that’s Romeo and Juliet. No, Desdemona is the only one who lives – everyone else dies – even her maids. (They get stabbed somehow.) Anyhow, it’s considered a “tragedy.” (Duh.) If you hadn’t already guessed, it was written by “The Bard” aka our friend Mr. Willy Shakespeare.

Characters (I’m not including Othello b/c I want you to read the book.)

Desdemona – She’s supposed to be very beautiful and extremely pale. You see, back in those days they didn’t have tanning salons yet and they didn’t yet realize the lovely mystique of a Oompa-Loompa like glow. (Clearly, they could take a few lessons from Snookie) [Please understand that my sarcasm hand is raised here.] She’s also very shy, but she has a rebel side because she falls for a black guy and back then interracial relations were a BIG no-no. Also, she’s COMLETELY in love with Othello. I remember hating her when we read the book because she was such a prissy-pants .There was lots of crap in the story about her being a “pure lily” and such fluff. Not only was she super pale, she was also super holy and unscathed. (Think: “Goody-Two-Shoes”) If I had to select an actress to play her, it’d be Selena Gomez. (No, I do NOT like that chick.) Obviously, they’d have to pile on the Edward Cullen makeup, but it’d be totally worth it because of how funny it would be to watch her try and play the “pure lily.” (Okay, now I’m being nasty…Selena really is a “good-girl,” but annoyingly so, and that’s why it bugs me.) Actually…ya know the FUNNIER actress to play this part would have to be a Jersey Shore cast member…I have to say I would DEFINITELY pay to see that movie. Practical pick? Lily Collins. If I didn’t hate the character of Desdemona so much, that’s who I’d have play her.

Emilia-something – Actually, I can’t really remember this girl’s name, which is sad considering she was actually my fave character. It started with an “E” though. Maybe it was Elle? I don’t remember. Anyway, I LOVED this girl. She’s Iago’s wife and Desdemona’s maid. She is always saying naughty things and just being generally amazing. Most of all, she tells Desdemona to follow her heart. Oh, and she accidentally helps her husband destroy the bonds between Othello and Desdemona, but it’s completely an accident. When she realizes her mistake though, she tries to fix it, but Iago KILLS her. (That was the part of the story where I threw the book across the room.) When Desdemona died, I really could have cared less, but Elle dying was just UGH. I have to say, that’s where it crossed the line to qualifying to “tragedy.” She was the one who told Desdemona she should run off with Othello, that she was being too prissy and annoyingly perfect etc. I really liked this chick. Who’d play her in a movie? Amanda Bynes, no debate about it. She’s picture perfect for the role. :] (I like Amanda Bynes… :])

Iago – This guy is VERY manipulative. He’s jealous, brilliant and awful. SO many people die because of his treachery. HOWEVER, I like to imagine him as extremely attractive. Why? Because villains always have something attractive about them – that’s why they succeed in evil-doing. Besides – Othello thinks that his wife is cheating on him with Iago, therefore Iago must be significantly hot considering how much Desdemona was in love with Othello. So, I’m thinking “superhuman good looks here.” (Not only because thinking so made the book that much more interesting [cuz who doesn’t like a cute bad boy?] but because it just makes the story more realistic.) Anyhoo – my picks for the actor? Idk. Maybe Leonardo DiCaprio? I mean, he’s got the whole “super human good look” thing down, but I bet we could bring out his sinister side.

You’re probably wondering why I didn’t include Othello. I know I said it is because I want you to read the book, but actually, I’m too lazy to type it up. You see, I don’t particularly admire or dislike the man, so I can’t exactly have fun with it. With Desdemona – I strongly dislike her and so I wanted to rant. In the case of Elle, I love that chick so I could have fun with it. And I both adore and strongly dislike Iago. So, his write-up was nice to do. :]

Anyway, Rory’s a peach for picking this book. It’s my fave Shakespeare!! :]

Note to ya’ll: I read this a LONG time ago, so don’t give me flak for not remembering half the story. ;]

Cheers,

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Mar

Mary - EXPLANATIONS

So, it’s officially January 1^st, and I’ve broken my promise of having all the reviews up. Before we start pointing fingers, allow me to say – IT WAS LORELAI’S FAULT!!! Truly. She kept me up all night eating ice cream and poking people.

In other news, the reviews are NOT up. And, well, it’s cuz I got busy. Not because I was hallucinating about Lorelai. But, that might have been a contributing factor, idk.

Anyway, as it stands, I still owe ya’ll THIRTEEN reviews. On the bright side, though, I did manage to read an extra novel and sneak THAT review in! (Devil Wears Prada). So, I got that one done! :) (BE PROUD OF ME!)

So, without further ado, I wish you all a very happy 2012. <3

Cheers,

Mar

<3 

Mary - Review "The Devil Wears Prada"

HEY PEOPLE

I was actually pretty excited to be reading this one. I’ve been eyeing it for a long time and now I finally had the chance to buy it and read it. It really wasn’t as good as I expected and the ending was unsatisfying. Allow me to elaborate.

ahhhh YEA, those are some SICK shoes. 

Andrea, fresh out of college, has ambitions to be an editor at the New York Times. She ends up in NY, living with her best friend Lily. She sends out resumes to all the magazines/newspapers and gets invited in @ Elais-Clark for a “chat” with the CEO of Runway magazine, Miranda Priestly, queen of the fashion world. Miranda Priestly is known as the “most important person” in NY high society, but she’s also the meanest. Long story short, Andrea gets a job as MP’s personal assistant. She’s told by everyone she meets that it’s the job “a million girls would die for.” As it turns out, it is, in fact, not the job “a million girls would die for,” but the job that “would kill a million girls.” This is, of course because MP turns out to be the boss from Hell. She’s rude, fires without a second thought and has an obessesion with scarves. She’s also incredibly vague. She gives orders like “pick up Madeline,” without ever specifying that “Madeline” is her French bulldog and is at the vet or where to find her or even where to drop her off. She demands that her employees dress/act/look a certain way, she’s snide and cruel. She’s impersonal and cold. Basically, she’s every horror story ever told  all put together and wrapped up in a white Hermes scarf.

MP

Okay, so far so good on the plot. Cliched? Yes. Enjoyable? Heck yeah!

She means business...

So, Andrea gets the job. And she works SO much that her bff turns into a raging alcoholic, her relationship with her bf is super strained. (She cheats on him, but he never finds out.) Anyway, in the end (spoiler alert) she tells Miranda to [expletive] off and gets fired, Lily gets into a car accident/coma and Alex (the BF) breaks up with her. So, she works for Seventeen magazine and then the book is over.

So, my main problem with the book is pretty obvious. It’s super incomplete. She never achieves her dreams, and she loses pretty much everyone who’s important to her. Oh, and she gets fired.

Poor Andy. 

HOWEVER, I have an even BIGGER problem with the book. All of the characters lack depth. They are ALL so one-sided, especially Andrea. All she ever does is WHINE WHINE WHINE. Honestly, at certain parts of the book, I felt like screaming “OHMYGOSH, WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE? BELLA FREAKING SWAN? STOP WHINING!”

NONE of the characters have dimension. Basically, she slapped them all with one trait and called it good. Alex is a do-gooder. Lily’s a woman of easy virtue who also happens to be a raging alcoholic. MP is a horrible boss, Emily (another employee) is paranoid/anorexic. And of course, Andrea is a whiny baby.

I expected SO much more out of this book. Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m not USUALLY a chick-flick kindof reader. Au contrare, my friends, I much prefer action and adventure. BUT, I usually like books about shopaholics, high society, etc. For instance, I LOVED “Confessions of a Mini-Shopaholic” and “The Nanny Diaries.” Both were amazing guilty pleasure reads. But “The Devil Wears Prada” was, quite frankly, weakly written.

It was enjoyable at some parts, but it’s not a book I’d really recommend unless you have nothing better to do, a phrase which here means “use this book only as an excuse not to trudge 3,000 miles through the dessert or drink toxic waste.”

PuhPuhPuhProduct placement! 

ALSO- the language of the book was atrocious. It’s like the writer had to include the f-bomb every other page. I don’t normally have a problem with that because cussing doesn’t “truly” offend me (I AM a teenager, after all….), but after a while it kind of felt like “Goodness, this author doesn’t have a very large vocabulary, does she?”

In conclusion - it's a guilty pleasure read that's not so pleasurable and is only guilty of being BORING. :)